Bro.

[D.]

www.collegehumor.com/video:1714286 Copy the whole link.

Probably the funniest thing I've seen on College Humor.

"You're just so pumped to be with the bros and everyone's cheering and you're so excited...you don't even realize, I just gave these guys four blowjobs"

[Gestapo]

I'll let Knief tell his "Bro Rape" story.

[Relish]

ive seen that video, so demented

[D.]

Matt, I'd consider you the rapist in most cases. Except I could never see you listening to Jack Johnson

[Knief]

Ok, so this guy Scott totally tried to bro rape me, but it happened before I saw this video so I was unaware of the phenomenon.

I met Scott briefly at a party the weekend before "the incident," and he seemed like a decent guy. We exchanged numbers, and I figured he'd give me a call next time he was going to a party, so I'd get some free beer. My first tip off that something was going to go awry was when he added me as a friend on facebook the very next day. That kind of act is typically reserved for the desperate guy stalking the girl who awkwardly said hi and walked away one day in class after she noticed him staring at her.

The following friday, he called me at about 3, and I chose to ignore the call, given the stalkerish behavior. I was still planning on hanging out with the guy, but I wanted to get the message out that we're not automatically friends, or "bros," as I would later find out, he puts it. I had a UofM hockey game to go to that night, so I called him back a few minutes before the game and told him to swing my my dorm when the game ended. When Scott showed up, we headed out to a park that I know in order to indulge in some legal substance use . He lead me to believe that we would be going to a party afterward, but I soon found out that that wasn't the case.

When we were thoroughly trashed, he suggested that we go back to his place to order some food and play Mario Kart on his game cube. I was immediately disappointed. I wanted to try to find some drunk girls and fail at getting them to go home with me.

-----interlude-----

Q: How do you get a University of Michigan girl back into your dorm room?

A: Grease up the door frame and push.

-----/interlude-----

My place was on the way to his place, and Scott had started to get creepy. I realized that the entire time, he hadn't once put forth an opinion of his own, only agreeing with me once I said something. That's a sign of two things. Either he was really desperate for friends and wanted to fake similar interests and world views or something to try to build some connection. Or, he was doing what pathetic guys do when they talk to girls; agree for the same reason as above. In either case, I wanted no part of it. So I said that I wanted to stop by my place, and the plan was to just not come back out. I could hang out in my dorm room for a bit while he figured out that I wasn't going to come back. I wish that's what happened.

Instead, he followed me up to my room like a lost puppy, but a lot creepier. As soon as we get into my room, he takes a seat in my comfortable chair, and I put away the contraban that I had on me, then grab a seat on the opposite side of the room. Scott insisted that we ought to go back to his room for Mario Kart and food, but I'm not about to follow him anywhere. For starters, he lives on the other side of campus and I didn't want to walk. But more importantly, I know where all of the weapons in my room are, and I positioned myself right next to my 7.5inch K-BAR. I told him that we could just order some pizza to my place and throw on a movie. He keeps insisting that we leave, and that, "Bro, it'll be awesome." Fuck that, I ordered a pizza and put on Slap Shot (If you're a hockey fan and haven't seen Slap Shot, get off your ass). The Pizza got here, we ate, and I did my best not to talk to him for the duration of the movie. One last time, he asked me to go back to his place to play his game cube. He was practically begging. I actually had to tell him to leave my room at this point. He's called once or twice and I won't make the mistake of answering him again.

I wish I had seen this video sooner, so I would have known what he was up to the first time he called me bro. I got off easy, but remember guys, everybody is a potential bro-rape victim. Be careful about who you meet at random parties, and always keep an eye on your corn hole.

[Mr Embed]

HAHAHAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHHHH!

++++++++++++1

[Gestapo]

"half of everyone I meet in Ann Arbor is g4y"- Knief

[Father_Livonia]

Wow, i am now convinced damo and embed will pull something on me in the dark hours of the night next time we "chill-out"

[AndrewMp5k2007]

admin said:

-----interlude-----

Q: How do you get a University of Michigan girl back into your dorm room?

A: Grease up the door frame and push.

-----/interlude-----

That was like what Dane Cook said in one of his Stand Ups, except he said he unhooked the frame so they just fell in.

[Mr Embed]

livoniairsoft said:

Wow, i am now convinced damo and embed will pull something on me in the dark hours of the night next time we "chill-out"

Damnit.. our plot is foiled.

[D.]

Bro, I'll bring the gamecube.

[Gestapo]

Don't forget the Keystone!

[El Phantasamo]

FUCK THAT!
Im buying a K-Bar

[Gestapo]

El... You're the one who does the bro raping.

[El Phantasamo]

gestapo said:

El... You're the one who does the bro raping.

DAMN! My secret is out

Stapo, wanna come over and check out my new K-bar?